Eating ketchup with a fork...mmmm.Hailey's language skills are improving exponentially everyday, but in the meantime, we still have to do a little interpretation when she speaks. Here are a few of my favorite Hailey phrases along with their adult translations:
"I spilled" - Mommy, while you stepped away for a second to grab a diaper, I took the opportunity to pee on your carpet. Please spend the rest of your morning cleaning it and me up. Thanks.
"Up, up, up" - Actually, I'd like you to put me down in the middle of this crowded store so that I might run away from you, pull things off the shelves, and throw a tantrum when you ask me politely to stop.
"Poopie potty" - Please take off my clothes and my diaper so that I can sit on the potty to let out one tiny toot.
"Bubbles" - I would like you to hand me the bubbles so that I can turn the bottle upside down, take the cap off, and watch the bubble stuff spill all over my legs.
"Brush teeth" - Please put some water on my toothbrush so that I can suck the water out without the brush ever touching my teeth.
"Tub" or "Shower" - I would like to get in the tub or the shower so that I can play with my toys in the water. Do not, however, attempt at any time to wash my body, let alone my hair. The consequences for this will be dire (and wet).
"Mine" - Whether or not you are holding the object or I am holding the object is inconsequential because that object is now mine. Whether or not you've owned the object for your whole life or five minutes is also inconsequential because that object is now mine, and the most important possession I've ever owned.
"Clean up" - I've dumped many rubberbands, crackers, letters, etc on the ground. I will now sing this song as I pick up two of them, hand them to you, and then leave the rest for you to clean up yourself. You can thank me later for teaching you how to clean up.
"Dip it" - I would like you to squirt a huge dollop of ketchup onto my plate so that I can dip my fingers in it and suck it off. Do not try to trick me by squirting anything else, like mustard, on to my plate. I will sit here and refuse to eat until this task is complete.
6 comments:
Grandma,
Well I am happy to see from your translations who runs the show in the Hamilton household. Alisa I can see you are quickly learning proper clean up procedures Hailey is doing a good job with your training. Keep up the good work.
Love,
Grandma
Yes, that child is doing a great job of training her parents. I absolutely loved the translations; it was the funniest blog you've written in a while, and I absolutely laughed out loud (LOL for those of you who are habitually IMing). All I can say, again, is: I hope you are enjoying every moment of this fast evolving, yet fleeting, time.
Love,
Dad
I needed a good laugh today, Thank you!
oh, i can't wait to see the teenage translations! do they even use words anymore, or just text type?
They just text at that age...and apparently that stage doesn't pass for some people. I've recently learned that any number of important interpersonal exchanges can take place over texting these day.
Too funny! What do they say about payback???? And that is the first unflattering picture I've seen of that child. She's got your number Sweetie!
Love, AA
Post a Comment