Cube Farms Not Friendly for Cows

When I was breastfeeding Hailey, I worked in a nice quiet office with a door and a lock. Every time I had to pump, I just closed the door, pulled the shades, and stuck those little suckers on. I could email; I could read; I could write a thesis (yes, I’m a multi-tasker). Now, I work in a big cube farm which is not at all conducive to pumping. Luckily, my wise employer has provided 2 “mother’s rooms” for exactly this purpose. One room is on my floor and the other is 2 floors up. Wouldn’t you know it, but the room on my floor is nasty with a toilet in it, not exactly sanitary conditions. The other room is a bit more comfortable, but about a mile away from where I sit. So, everyday, no matter how badly my feet are throbbing from my new, cute work shoes, I have to stop what I’m doing and march myself up there, lugging my big mama double-pump bag. Did I mention that I have to do this three times a day? Then, I have to walk my throbbing little feet back to my break room to quietly slip the little milk cooler (which says Medela all over it…not much on subtlety) into the fridge. At that point, I can return to my desk, put my big-mama-jo pump bag away and resume normal operations. This is what some might call a big pain in my ass.

Oh, and as if this whole little process was not difficult enough, there can be complications. For example, today I finished pumping only to realize that I didn’t have a lid for the milk bottle or a bag to put the milk in to carry it downstairs. How was I going to transport this liquid gold in an unopened bottle all the way down the elevator, through the quads without spilling it? Well, there was no other option than to carry the opened bottle in my hand. Now, I’m walking through the halls with an open container of breastmilk. “Hey, Alisa, what’s that you’ve got there?” “Oh just some breastmilk, Dr. So and So. Want a sip?” Note: That didn’t really happen, but the thought of it was mortifying. Of course, I can’t take the milk home now because I don’t want to carry it all the way out of the building so it has to sleep in the fridge overnight. Moooo!